Comments on: Grieving at Christmas

By: Maria Kristen

Maria Kristen — Mon, 20 Dec 2010 19:53:05 +0000

What a beautiful and honest letter. It is no small thing that in spite of this tragedy you are reaching for happiness. Bless you. Be patient with yourself for not finding happiness every day. It is sad that Christmas, birthdays and anniversaries bring us pain as we feel things should be “a certain way.” Let it go. Make what you can of each day knowing it is only one of many in the long journey of living. Small moments of happiness can be enough to bring us gradually back to joy. I always find it amazing to see that my happiest days were always the days when I expected nothing of them. Be patient with yourself about getting past this loss. American culture gives us 3 days to mourn! In other cultures years of mourning are expected. My father died 7 years ago and I will cry when I see his picture. But I no longer spend my days crying and for this I am happy. Somehow, even in the longest winter, spring – and grace – always come.

By: Gyanama

Gyanama — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 16:26:56 +0000

The healing process rest on three fundamental laws.
1-Your thinking determines your experience
2-Your thinking can be spiritualized through and understanding of God(Your Maker)
3-This improved thinking must than manifest itself in an improved state of existance

By: Gyanama

Gyanama — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 16:13:55 +0000

In reference to your statement
“How do we survive Christmas and try to put on a brave face when really all I want to do is to get away from pretending I’m ok”.
That to me was a very profound statement you made, one in which continues to keep you in the grief you are trying to heal, and yet also offers what it is in your “thinking” on what needs to be healed first and foremost. I believe it was Deepak who once said that an emotion is a thought tied to a sensation. The thought sensation that you are feeling is calling itself grief… Deepak offered very important healing information to you when he stated “What is important for the survivors is to deal with their emotions that arise in response to the loved one’s death”. We must handle our thoughts and we must keep handling them until we know that we really are OK. You say that you’re pretending to be OK when in Truth You ARE OK. The pretense is in the grief, not in YOU… Only you my friend can discard the thoughts of grief and set yourself free from its erroneous hold on you….You have the power, not the grief, and that is what your husband may not have realized – He didn’t handle his own thoughts on grief.
Keep putting on your brave face and You will heal this grief, and KNOW THAT YOU HAVE THE POWER TO DO SO, God has already made you Perfectly OK but it is up to you when you decide to set yourself FREE of the false emotions that seem to bind you.
HANDLE THIS PRETENSE THOUGHT OF GRIEF, AND KNOW THAT YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND ARE BOTH OK

By: Barbara

Barbara — Wed, 08 Dec 2010 14:42:52 +0000

Dear woman, I was reading your letter while hearing the end part of this song (min 5:00 till end) and it seemed to fit so beautiful. Maybe you’d want to hear it too. much love Barbara

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bUaMzwNPgro&translated=1