Comments on: Reaching an Impasse in a Relationship

By: Kat

Kat — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 18:22:40 +0000

Thank you.

By: jeff

jeff — Tue, 22 Feb 2011 00:23:57 +0000

reread Deepak’s response, it is beautiful and true

By: Jennifer J

Jennifer J — Sun, 20 Feb 2011 05:46:05 +0000

Now you see, a person’s growth is not just by practicing meditation or going to chuch. People can fake to be spiritual, or be spiritual but not really understand the true nature of reality.

Understanding our nature of reality and our meanning for life are the key to a person’s internal growth.

Our feeling for inner peace and happiness is surposed to be expended overtime. But when we got lost, all we have to do is to find that inner peace again, and do everything to maintain that peace.

Jennifer
meditationlovers.com

By: raj

raj — Sat, 19 Feb 2011 15:24:04 +0000

I remember after my father had his 3rd heart attack his behavior radically changed and there was a lot of anger being expressed. We learnt that men frequently experience great anxiety and depression after heart attacks, not only because of the reality of death, but especially because of their worry about how they are going to provide for their family before and after they die. We had to move out of our home for about 2 weeks because the anger was so violent and unpredictable. After my father got through this period, the love of my parents for each other became greater than ever. It sounds like your husband needs some type of professional support to help him through this transitional time, and maybe a health checkup. You could probably benefit from some type of support, also. I send love and prayers to both of you.

By: Debbie Bridge

Debbie Bridge — Sat, 19 Feb 2011 14:49:16 +0000

He is having a mid life crisis. He is also blaming you for everything that went wrong in his life. What should you do? Buy a beautiful dress and strapless heels and go out. Have a good time with others.It is the only thing that will escalate his ‘process’ and give him something else to think about besides himself. Blessings!

By: jeff

jeff — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 22:32:04 +0000

I’d like to add that tolerating abuse can become a spiritual practice, but one question you might consider is; is it necessary to experience and overcome reactivity to abuse to make spiritual progress?
I say make videos of the arguements and resulting outbursts. Save up a bunch of them, then spend some time in the kitchen together making up a tray of your favorite snacks and spend a friday night together watching your private ‘reality show’.

By: Mother Lightning

Mother Lightning — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 13:44:53 +0000

Good response to a very complex situtation. We all have things in our lives to overcome & heal from.

w/ love & peace always,
Mother Lightning
of[thepeacegarden.blogspot.com]

By: Mikael Jakobsson

Mikael Jakobsson — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 08:29:17 +0000

I find it fascinating that we get stuck trying to figure out who is responsible for starting a disagreement.

A disagreement occurs when two people are having different views. Having your own perspective is the obvious consequence of being an individual. Nothing wrong with that. As a result there will always be disagreement whenever there are more than one person involved.

As Deepak points out, the key to managing the disagreements is understanding. Understanding that both perspectives could be valid and should be respected. To do this we need to let go of our own perspective for a while. Letting go of the ego. This causes fear, and it is only this fear we need to manage.

The fact that you are having disagreements means that you can still, after so many years together, enrich each other with new perspectives. That is great!

The trouble with letting go of the emotions is completely normal. It is the result of the uncertainty that “intensity” creates for you. Uncertainty that he loves you and will always be there for you. When this happens, don’t “talk about it”. Just tell him that you feel insecure and that you need his strength. Tell him that you need him to hold you, so you can feel his love. It will do wonders.

Love is the best way to manage fear, after all.