Block on the word “God”

I am basically a happy, harmonious person. I feel a desire to develop more on a spiritual level, but I have such a block on the word “God”. So much of the way that word is used actually repulses me. I also cannot seem to separate the word from what it meant to me as a child — the idea of someone, an actual being, up in space. It seems intellectually absurd.

Because of this I have a very hard time reading most spiritual writing and being open to spiritual growth. My questions are these: why would I have such a strong, almost physical, aversion to a word, and how can overcome this?