Late Motherhood

I was raised in a home where verbal assault, and sometimes physical assault, was regular. Although I am now over 50, I unfortunately retain an aggressive nature. I raised my first three children with impatience and an overly-firm hand. I now have a late-life child and for her sake, as well as my own, I don’t want to continue the destructive cycle of impatience and hyper-aggressiveness. I believe that after all this time of living in high-stress, it has become part of my physical and spiritual being — an addiction. How, through food, meditation and balancing, can I reverse the damage to myself and avoid damaging my precious baby? I want to live a peaceful, joyful, energetic, and “living in the moment” life. How?