How Men Can Be Wise About Women (Part 2)

Everyone would agree that the relationship between men and women is all-important, not just in daily life but to the well-being of a society. In my first post I raised the troubling wedge that is being driven between the two sexes. My focus was on scientific fads — almost totally unsupported by experimental data — for assigning gender differences to genes and brain activity. On the technical side we are led to believe that behavior is determined by automatic processes, largely unconscious, that make us who we are. This kind of determinism is very bad thinking. It robs us of free choice, but just as importantly, it leads to the belief that men are very different from women, with some kind of deterministic mechanism as the cause.

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Embracing Uncertainty or Recklessness

I recently met a man in a bar. After a very short introduction, we became close friends. He is many years younger than I am and is not stable in his life. He does not have a job or a car or even a permanent home. I think he is a very nice person and I enjoyed spending time with him, but my instincts tell me he would be a big risk for me. I have two children, a brand new house and many things I have worked very hard to get.

According to the law of detachment, I am supposed to embrace uncertainty. This man tells me he has many plans for his future, yet I am skeptical to believe in his intentions. So all my instincts are telling me not to pursue a relationship with him. Yet, I wonder if there is a reason we were drawn together that night. Am I supposed to help him? Am I supposed to ignore the risks I could be putting myself and my children in with the hopes he could turn out to be the man I am looking for? I actually have a past record of relationships with men who needed a helping hand. Neither of those worked out well for me. If I do not look to my past experiences to make this choice, then I may be doomed to keep repeating it. How do I discern between letting go of the past influences in my life and making a wiser choice?

Feeling Uncertain

I’m very unsure in the things I do, I have a new job what I really like but I’m very uncertain about myself, I know that I’m good in my work but because I’m so uncertain I make mistakes . Because of that i sabotage myself and want to quit my job. I get angry about it and start to make mistakes. That makes me a person that never accomplishes something in the things I do. I hope you understand my English. I wish I could be more sure about myself to finish things, especially for my children to show them to go on with the things they do in life. Do you have a tip for me?